Buzzed and Beautiful

Since moving to Colorado my life has shifted in the most unusual ways…

I have my first post-grad job, my dreams have become incredibly vivid, I crave chicken (vegetarian for 10+ years), I dress differently, I’ve been questioning some of the values that I’ve held all my life, and I shaved my head.

Yep! You read that right, I shaved my hair off. And man does it feel good! Okay, so technically I didn’t… I had someone else do it but it’s gone and that’s what matters.

Lets backtrack a bit…

A few weeks ago I was feeling alone in a new town and in need of some pampering. I decided that I was going to get my hair done because who doesn’t love getting their hair played with… Right? After calling all the hair places near me, I gave up and continued running my errands. On my bike ride home I saw a sign outside this hair salon that said $25 haircuts.. I instantly felt drawn to it so I went in and they were magically able to squeeze me in… Almost like it was meant to be.

I ended up getting a trim, my hair colored, they told me some new tips of where to go and hang out throughout Colorado, and left feeling great and pampered… All good right? Wrong.

The next few days my hair began to feel incredibly toxic. It didn’t’t fit me anymore and didn’t represent who I am. I have never felt that way after getting my done but I know not to question something when it doesn’t feel good. I tried it out for a few days and once it got to be too heavy I made an appointment at Supercuts to chop it off.

Initially I went with a shorter style to see how it felt and looked. Seeing the hair on the ground felt so freeing and it was symbolic seeing them sweep it away. I left feeling so good about myself and much lighter. I still had my bangs (which I loved) and my hair was right to my jaw line.

The next few days were spent explaining to people at work why I decided to make the chop and how good it felt but there was a part of me that felt there was more to get off.

After paying for two haircuts I decided to save some money and began the search for someone who had clippers.

There’s this guy who comes in to work a few times a week (total hottie). I figured he’s cute, and bald, he must have clippers. And sure, enough HE DID! We exchanged numbers and set a date to make the cut.

At this point I had enough time to detach from my hair and when he came over to make the cut I was ready. I figured it would be smart to get to know him before I let him cut off my hair.. Especially since he would be putting his energy into it and I want to make sure that I am surrounded by good vibes while I’m being vulnerable like this. (Probably one of the most vulnerable things a woman can do)

So we talked, and we walked, and got to know each other a bit and when we got back it was time. Naturally my ego kicked in right before and decided that it was not a good idea but deep in my soul I knew I needed this.

The clippers on my scalp felt so good and relaxing and it felt right. Almost like a scalp massage, which helped a lot. I could feel all of the hair falling off and with each section I could feel myself letting go of some things I’ve been holding on to for longer than needed. I didn’t even want to see what it looked like externally because I FELT good internally! And sometimes seeing things in the mirror can skew things but I did it anyway and holy crap it was weird.

Fast forward a week or two…

I literally can’t stop touching my hair. I LOVE IT! And other people do too. I have inspired others to do it, I feel more myself, and I feel more beautiful than I ever have with longer hair. It feels like the start of a whole new life and a whole new me. And it’s nice to be able to just wake up and go places without having to worry about my hair at all. I’m going to take the hair and make an earth painting with it in the hopes that some birds will come pick it up and use it. But I am in love with the new me and it has created this confidence that I never knew I had in me and it’s magical.

I read a quote before.. Well there were two that really stood out to me and were the final push:

“A woman who cuts her hair is going to change her life” -Coco Chanel

“I hope that someday I’ll love myself enough to shave my head” -Author Unknown


Would you ever shave your head? What’s the craziest thing you’ve done that represented a big shift in your life?


The Blog Vow

Hey hey!

Lately I’ve been pretty wrapped up in work and completely reorganizing my room around. It feels like I need to tap into my creative side but I have to idea where to start. Hence why I haven’t been writing much…

When I first started this blog I imagined myself coming up with all of these great posts that made people want to come back and keep reading. But as you can see, I’m three posts in after a few weeks and I’m already stumped. I intended to write a post about things I’ve learned from working in customer service. I also wanted to write a post about the people you meet while traveling. Aside from the blog I had the great idea of making necklaces and selling them.. Only to get sidetracked and put the project on hold.

I’ve been reading this book called Big Magic, you might have heard of it but it basically teaches you how to live your most creative life without fear. If you plan on reading it then maybe skip the next little bit… BUT, it talks about how we are living beings and so are ideas. They are living things and come and please as they want.

She talks about how when an idea comes to you, there are three things you can do.

  1. Say no, thank the idea, and pass it along.
  2. Start the project, recognize that it’s not the right time/let it drag on too long and lose it.
  3. Say hell yes and dive in to that one thing until you’ve finished it completely.

Obviously with the ideas I’ve had lately have started as a 3 and then fizzled to a 2 because of pure laziness… And I don’t mean to make this post sad or depressing, I just realized that making this blog was a space for me to unload and put myself out there. Obviously not everyone is going to like what I have to write, I honestly am grateful if even one person reads it.

Anyway, the point of this particular post is to make a vow to myself and this blog page to post AT LEAST once a week. And even if it is scattered and sloppy to get it all out on here, because why the hell not. So stay tuned for more exciting posts! Maybe I’ll even end up writing the posts that I originally intended to…

Because we’re all Prisoners

Hey again,

For those of you reading this and don’t know… I work at a natural foods store (not saying which one), and yesterday was NOT a good day. You know when you wake up and  everything is saying no?

I slept past my alarm, my bike tires were flat, I was almost late to work… You get the picture…

So at work yesterday I kept trying to shake it but couldn’t seem to get my head on right. Thankfully today was loads better! As a customer service worker I get a great chance to meet people and hear some interesting things. Here are three examples:

The first person I’ll tell you about was this older woman. Probably the cutest, happiest, most friendly person I’ve come across and it was completely genuine. She was talking about her day and making sure that she did everything she could to help out. Honestly, the fact that she was so genuine made me tear up. First, because she was a little ray of sunshine in my darker day. And second, because there aren’t many people these days who are truly 100% genuine and care about other people. Especially at the store… Trust me, I know I’m probably not the most pleasant person to deal with when shopping for food. But there I was, at work, almost in tears because of how nice this one lady was.

A little kindness goes a LONG way people.

The second person, was another older woman. She comes in and puts her items on the belt and then goes through and immediately starts bagging her things. I thank her for helping and she says “Of course, you’ve not my slave”. Now, that kind of put me off so I just carried on and asked how her day was going. She replies with, “It’s great! It’s so beautiful out there… But you wouldn’t know cause you’re a prisoner.” Again, odd comment, but I continue with the conversation and a few times she repeated the phrase “But you wouldn’t know, you’re a prisoner.”

What the..? I may be new to the job but I don’t think I’m a prisoner by any means… I love my job so far and they actually treat us pretty well so I made sure to let her know but in a polite way of course. Then she headed off and said I’ll be seeing her around, hopefully I don’t get called a prisoner again when I do. Especially because I choose to be there, I am not being kept against my will and it’s better than sitting in an office all day at a computer. I get to meet some really nice people and am a part of the community.

The third person, okay. This one is from today and was a complete disaster. We were chatting and we discovered that the cheese didn’t have a price tag on it so I was dealing with that and bagging. During the middle of everything she asked me to take off the tax because she had a special card. I say okay and carry on (that is usually done at the end). At the end of the transaction I read the total and hit the okay button. At that point the transaction was charged, probably the fastest it’s ever worked. I gave her the receipt and she started freaking out about the tax. It was $3 in tax but I guess it HAD to be taken off. So I call over my team leader and honestly, it took us at least 30 minutes to figure it all out. We ended up having to return EVERYTHING and then ring it all back up again. In the end it all worked out but the fact that we had to shut down the lane during lunch hour… Definitely stressful, and had it been yesterday I would’ve totally broken down and lost it.

I think the point of this shifted from the original one I had somewhere in the middle. But what I want you to get out of this post; be kind to people working in customer service. Don’t assume anything, we’re all just trying to do our part and we’re honestly doing our best. Please be patient and maybe ask how our day is, or get to know us rather than throwing your money at us and running. We matter too and we are not prisoners… At least not the ones I work with. There is a reason we’re there. Whether it’s to save money for a trip, school, family, maybe we’re barely scraping to make ends meet… Whatever the case is. Be kind, and tell us important things about the transaction either before or after. Not in the middle.

Thanks for reading! More to come soon! ❤

The Beginning, Why Colorado…?

Alright, so I don’t really want to admit how long it took to set this thing up… Honestly probably an hour or two. BUT here we are! We made it!

The point of this is to write about my life, and I’m going to be 100% honest. But of course I’m going to choose what I write about because I don’t know who will end up reading this.

But as I mentioned in my little about me blurb, I recently packed everything into my little Blue Subaru Forester (Freddy) and moved my entire life to Colorado. Never been anywhere past Arizona but I had a job and housing already set up and I wasn’t looking back!

(Okay maybe a little cause my family is in CA and the beach but you know what I mean)

Why Colorado you may ask? So does every person I talk lately… My answer is usually along the lines of… “Well it was between Washington, Oregon, and Colorado and Colorado gets the most sunshine” and then we all laugh and continue on with the conversation…

Want to hear the long version?

I graduated from CSU, Chico (Go Wildcats) in December 2016 and had absolutely no idea what I wanted to do. I started this new thing back in 2013 where I go on a trip each year, usually in the summer since I had school but since I’m done I decided to start looking for places to go.

Some backstory: A while back I had gone to see a family friend who is an Empath and during the session, after some hard truths were discovered, she told me that Peru was in the plans for me.

So I popped Peru into google and eventually found an organization that seemed to be a good fit and set up. Around mid December I was done with school and staying with my parents in So Cal till the program started in March. The New Year and I got so restless. In order to distract myself, my mom and I got this groupon for a month of free yoga at this cute little yoga studio. It was so fun going to yoga with my mom but what I wasn’t expecting to really get too much out of it.

During one of the classes, the teacher was going around and doing reiki and it was during the last savasanah that I immediately thought, I want to help people feel like this!! Like legit, I was going to do whatever I could so the second I got home I was scrolling through instagram looking for local teacher trainings and anything else along those lines. It may have taken a day or two but I found the cutest page that had yoga workshops and was having a reiki 1 attunement course at the end of January. I checked out some other ones but there was something that kept calling me back to that one so I put down the payment and was set to attend the two-day attunement!

I think that’s when I really started to get antsy because I was ready to go and do something and do it NOW.. Sooo once again I popped Peru into the google machine and this time I searched yoga teacher trainings. There are seriously SO MANY teacher trainings and they are all so special in their own way.

It’s so interesting how there are certain things that just stand out to you. Websites, organizations, trainings, schools, people, etc. It feels like it’s perfect and you have no idea why. That’s how I felt about SchoolYoga Institute. They didn’t have much advertising going on and it didn’t seem very well-known but I decided to go with it anyway. The dates fit perfectly with my reiki attunement and the volunteer trip so I booked the training and  my flights and started to pack!

Keep in mind at this point it was mid January and I was set to leave in two-ish weeks. Very impulsive, I know.

So January passed and it was time for the attunement, and wow. Honestly, I’m not going to even begin to get into that right now. I’ll make a different post about that if it’s a topic of interest… The first night was the attunement and then the next night we got to practice. So by February 2nd I was reiki 1 attuned and hitting the plane for Peru!

Fun fact: My parents have been waiting to start their house remodel for two years and the start date ended up being the same day that I left… What timing, right?

The leaving is always the hardest part… But I got to Cusco, had a day to settle and acclimatize (elevation is no joke) and then was off to the Sacred Valley to begin the training!

Again I won’t get too much into the training because I could write PAGES on every single thing that happened so I’ll add a different post about that.

During the training we got to do a Coca leaf reading with this Shaman from Peru named Doris. For those of you who don’t know, Coca leaves are what make cocaine but you need a TON of it in order to make it basically… And I mean a TON! But they also help with getting used to elevation and coca leaf readings apparently.

So Doris was reading my leaves and I’m not going to tell you all of it because as she said, “It takes away the magic” and I really liked what she was sayin’ so I’m just going to keep that between me and my journal 😉

But basically she started off telling me about my life so far and what could/will happen in the future. After that she then asked if I had any questions. Uhh, hell yeah I did!

After graduating I felt like I needed to have it all figured out but I honestly had no idea where I even wanted to eat lunch let alone where I wanted to LIVE. My grandparents live in Washington State and I loved the atmosphere there, and of course being a die-hard Grey’s Anatomy fan a few years back, I added Washington to the list of potential places. Then I figured… Oregon is pretty similar so I’ll add that to the list too… And just to throw everything off I thought, wow Colorado could be cool too.

Okay so adding CO to the list wasn’t actually that random… I’ve had a few friends who have gone out here for school and loved it. I met a Brazilian while at Chico who came out here to work in Vail for a winter and I fell in love with the (very few) pictures he posted. AND to top it off…

Okay rewind a little: I went on a volunteer trip to Africa and climbed Mount Kilimanjaro during summer 2016 (another post to come) and met this incredible man who, basically is the epitome of the man I want to marry. Before the Africa trip he had gone to Peru and did a Macchu Picchu trek so I figured, hey! He lives in California and I live in California, why don’t we meet up and chat about Peru and life?

So we did! He told me all about his trip and gave suggestions of what to do during my time there and then we started talking about life and future plans and everything. But during the chat he shared the story of how he ended up in California and how eventually he wants to be out in Colorado. So of course I think that may have has a tiny bit of an influence but it wasn’t the definitive reason why I chose it!

Back to my session with Doris: I decided to ask where I should move to after the training and gave her the three options. She set up the leaves, and the cool thing about it was that she had me blow on the leaves with my intention, like putting your soul into the leaves and then leaving it up to the universe. And then she dropped them and about 2/4th of the leaves went onto the Colorado leaf, 1/4th went onto Washington, and the last 1/4th went around it all.

She explained that in the end I’ll be happy wherever I choose. I’m sure you can imagine how annoying that was to hear because it didn’t help anything. I think she knew so she explained that Colorado was calling me now but I’ll end up in Washington sometime later on.

Of course, you know these kind of things I’m always a little apprehensive about so when the time came to start finding housing and work I applied to places in both Colorado and Washington and just gave it up to the universe. The most amazing part was that I started getting emails for interviews and house showings in CO and heard nothing back from the places in Washington. It just seemed to work itself out…

And that is how I chose Colorado, or you could say that it chose me. And it has been scary, stressful, and crazy. But so incredibly beautiful, and I can’t wait to tell you more about my life here.